Shakshuka

Gym session finished and I fought my way to just under 300 calories, Tavish is burning hunners and I'm still struggling to get that barrier broken in the gym, I will keep trying.

I showered and walked up to the bus stop where I had arranged to meet Svenja, today we are taking the bus to Tel Aviv, one because we want to and two because I want to show Svenja where Hatachana is for when her parents come over.  We jumped on the first bus that came along, neither of us taking any notice of what was going on, well until we ended up down towards my house and we realised we had jumped on the wrong bus, it was the Tel Aviv bus but having walked to the bus stop closer to the town centre we should have missed all the detours around Herzliya, but no we ended up going all the way round before arriving back at the bus stop we had started at and then we headed towards Tel Aviv, good job we are happy housewives or we would have had something to say about our misdemeanour.

We arrived in Tel Aviv and headed to Neve Tzedek, I had intended to eat at Hatachana but my belly got the better of me and we ate in LuLu's in Neve Tzedek instead, I ordered Shakshuka and Svenja order the muesli, our food arrived and I was warned about the dish being extremely hot, on the second burn to my arm I decided it would be best to cover the handle with my cloth napkin.....

To say my lunch was delicious was very understated, the dish consisted of tomatoes, onions, a little herbs some chillie and two eggs, its the first time I have been tempted to try this dish, Lou Lou tried it when she was here, myself I have waited until I was in a restaurant where I felt comfortable in the knowledge that my Shakshuka would be very well made and I was right, the tomato dish was spicy enough to give you a hit, and not so spicy as to blow your head off, the eggs baked in the dish amid the tomatoes where lovely and I was very happy with my choice, as was Svenja with her muesli, have you ever noticed how difficult it is to spell meusli by the way, so far today I have tried to spell museli numerous ways, and each time spell check screamed in red underneath my attempts, I laugh in the face of spell check, if I wanna spell seerial the wrong way I will.

After our lunch we headed to Hatachana and stopped for a wee coffee, now Svenja knows how to get there we could head to the market and collect some veggies and other bits that we needed before heading back to the bus. Our bus driver was a very nice gentleman who kept us right as to the correct bus stop we should be waiting at, especially as the bus stop had nothing written on it to indicate which bus stopped at it.

We headed home two happy ladies with plentiful supplies of veggies, oils and fruits.

Iron Dome

We spent the night in Haifa and woke in our old apartment, it was lovely to be home, well until the new cleaner came in at 7.30 that is, it transpired that Nelly doesn't do text messages and the one I had sent her yesterday to say we would be staying over, and can I get coffee from her lovely coffee maker had not been read, if I want to get in touch with Nelly, who has a phone I have to phone Itzhak apparently, I really must remember that for next time.

I sat in the sitting room whilst the cleaner did her thing, which included smoking out the back door and stinking the house up, but seeing as I don't actually live there anymore it was not my place to tell her the house smelt like an ashtray.  Nelly arrived a little later and made me promise to pop over and see her for coffee before we left for home, I headed up to Mandarin for breakfast and to get my blog set up, that done I headed back to the apartment and awaited the return of My Beloved who was upsetting Captains down at the port, mainly because he had asked what he should call the said Captain, and Sir came the reply, not perturbed he asked again what he should call him, and he was informed the Captain was actually called Ariel, as in the soap powder, My Beloved said is there not a mermaid with the same name, but the Captain cut him off mid sentence, obviously he has seen that movie too....

We called Itzhak when My Beloved arrived back from the port but there was a mix up in communications and we missed one another, so we have now promised to meet up again and phone Itzhak next time we are coming through. We left for Herzliya and home, we arrived, unpacked and then headed for the Marina and the supermarket, no chicken stock cubes to be found, can you believe we have to grab them when we can in Israel, so I think I will be getting our visitors to bring some over when they come in February as we are now running at zero.

We both hit the gym after the supper was in the oven and the food was put away, today my goal was to break 300 cals in the gym no easy feat the way my calories burn, slow, slow, dead slow, stop, it eventually took me an hour and 20 mins to get to 300 a recumbent bike is shit for burning calories. I jumped around doing skater squats, I squatted in the air and lunged into the rear and I walked up the wall before walking down into a full press up, and it still took me forever to get that magic number again, it's not like I was even trying to get to 500 today, just 300 it wasn't much to ask for. The rest of our evening was spent with Vaio who is misbehaving, so say she is unresponsive would be an understatement, we have removed her utilities, she has been stripped bare and still she is un-yeilding in her determination to be the naughtiest computer in history, thank god I have the mac because otherwise that thing would have been under the iron dome by now......

Murder vs mayhem

Friday was a great day, I hit the gym on my own as My Beloved was having a lazy day, once I was done we headed for the bus as we had decided to see the sights from the top of a single decker, but it is amazing how much you can see when you are higher than car level, you can see over fences into gardens and even in to living rooms if you really crane your neck.  This was all new to My Beloved who is only ever at chest level because he is usually in the car. Herzliya has some lovely sights, like the swimming pool in the rather large house on Wingate, or the patio furniture of Hanassi or the rather gruff looking security guard patrolling one of the residences. We made our way to Tel Aviv, and although our destination was the Carmelit bus stations we ended up getting off in Dizengoff as we had spotted some market stalls that piqued our interest.

We walked around what appeared to be a flea market for want of a better name, nun chucks, nuckledusters and daggers were on display, obviously it is not illegal to sell such things in the centre of Tel Aviv there were knives of varying lengths and type all of them pretty scary, and the accompanying stalls were full of none scary items like jewellery and bric a brac, we left the market and headed towards Carmelit and lunch, as usual we started to zig zag through the streets, and we eventually happened across a very busy Thai restaurant, we were shown to our seats at the bar as these were the only ones available, when eating in Israel you really must pre-book that table.  The waiter helped us with our choices and when our food arrived disappointment was not a word we used, my dish which was my second choice as the first one was gonna take 20 mins to prepare and I maybe would have eaten the Beloved's right arm had I had to wait that long, well it was King fish, not a fish I have heard of but sometimes its good to go out on a limb or a fish in this case, it was luscious accompanied by shitake mushrooms and pak choi, bean sprouts and chilli and a bowl of white rice on the side. Initially I thought offt I aint eating that stuff it'll kill ya, but I have to say after a wee tester it was the best rice I have ever tasted and I ate the lot, it was delicious and I would definitely recommend that Thai House restaurant to anyone looking for something other than the traditional.  

My Beloved had a pork dish of some kind and his also was delightful on the tongue and accompanied by rice, he has far more willpower than I and only ate half his rice, well he was saving his calories for alcohol......

We left the restaurant and headed towards the sea front, our initial plan was to head to Neve Tzedek which was why we had come in by bus, having been side tracked by a flea we just strolled the streets of Tel Aviv and checked out all there was to see, we have noticed that Tel Aviv beach front from around the Trumpeldor area towards the Marina is under construction, the beach front cafes have been pulled down and are in the process of being rebuilt, this also includes part of the promenade and many of the restaurants that are usually bustling with people were in fact closed, the place was still very, very busy with the runners and volleyball players who were on the beach, the cyclists and dog walkers, the lovers and the lonely all walking and parading along the promenade.

We walked and walked and walked until we were into the old Port area but having taken a slighted elevated route which gave us a beautiful view across to Jaffa and out to sea, we walked through parks we never knew existed and along streets that we have only ever driven past, we eventually found our first wine bar of the evening, a little Kosher Italian bistro and here we had our first wine of the evening. Unfortunately for us we sat down at the wrong table, our neighbouring table was occupied by Mrs "I like the sound of my own voice", so we moved we put her down wind so as to quieten her down a bit, it helped immensely and I didn't have to kill her, see back to murdering again!!!!

The rest of our evening was spent trudging the streets of Tel Aviv, meandering between the wine bars of Dizengoff, through to Neve Tzedek and eventually ending up a the little wine bar we happened across many moons ago, we sat and chatted with the waitress who came from Haifa and drank expensive wine, only because they didn't have any cheap shit, we ate cheese and eventually left and I had a terrible urge for Max Brenner well you would wouldn't you, after building up an appetite by walking around Tel Aviv all day I thought it only polite to feed that appetite with chocolate, so I did, I do hate to be impolite............

Shabbatt

Once again I hit the gym My Beloved was lazy for the second day, but this was forgiven as we were then heading out for a bike ride, our initial plan was to cycle to Netanya and we got as far as Yakum park and realised that we could go no further as the roads had turned into tracks, and picnic areas, which had I had my mountain bike I may have managed, but I had the Carrera and she is just too much lady and very little grunt when it comes to sandy tracks or anything resembling sandy tracks, so we did no more than headed back the way and breakfast was taken in the Europark with all the other cyclists out enjoying the beautiful weather, families were sitting on the grass verges, now this wasn't random you understand they had the full package, picnic blankets, packed lunches and free flowing juice, all on a grass verge in a car park off a motor way, go figure.

We eventually cycled back and I was determined I was going to hit the 500 calorie before I stopped, this proved tricky as I had to keep going around the block so as to not get home before the 500 was reached, why oh why is it so hard for me to burn calories, it's always been the same, even in classes I remember a certain Tavish burning millions of calories and I wouldn't even reach 400, My Beloved burned almost a 1000 with our 27.39km cycle, and I was so proud of myself because I busted my gut and eventually could go home because I had reached the golden number, I could hardly get up the stairs to put the washing in the machine, but who cares the 500 had been broken, hoo bloody ray.......

Jail time

How many years do you get for murder these days?


I don't ask this question lightly, if I have one more sleepless night because my ears are bleeding it may be something I might, if really pushed hard enough, but only as a last resort you understand, be forced into contemplating, this will not just be some passing whim you understand, I will weigh all the pro's and con's, like I will be fed three times a day, and according to a friend of ours I will have my own PC, or did he say I would be arrested by a PC, I'm so tired it's difficult to remember. My washing and ironing will be done for me, but best of all I will no longer have bleeding ears.

What I wouldn't give for a peaceful nights sleep.  I actually think I would sell our Vagina for one, or at least rent her out to a trainee Psychiatrist for study purposes. Our kid on the other hand is so laid back I not sure he would make a good study subject, well not unless you managed to get him out of bed and communicating before supper time that is.  The Prince's wouldn't give me much in the way of profit either, the eldest has got flat feet, and the youngest has round shoulders from carrying the eldest, such is my life, so you see the only one of any use is our Vagina, there is so much going on in her world the Psychiatrist may need a psychologist to get the gist of what's wrong with the circular world of a 27 year old that is more rugby shaped than circular, that is the world not the child....

Back to my bleeding ears, My Beloved and his snoring, how comes someone so beautiful can make a sound only a pig in heat would make, why does he stop breathing, then frighten the bejezus out of me half way through the night when he suddenly remembers to inhale, although that said he is quiet when he stops, hmmm something else to consider, I have plenty of pillows, maybe I should stop using them for my ears and start covering his noisy mouth.

When I did eventually get to sleep Whinny the witch and Henry the Heafer started whining through the walls, I swear to god they must have been standing on stools and squawking down the air con unit because I was convinced I was sharing a bed with them they were that noisy, and there was plenty of room as My Beloved had left for work. That said just because I have a big bed does not mean I want to share it with the bloody neighbours, revenge is a wonderful thing when tasted with your coffee, MTV full blast and the washing machine on full spin, if that doesn't make their eyes water and quieten them down I don't know what will.

My Beloved on the other hand is a work in progress!!!

Give a child a pretty name.........

So Sunday the landlady came for a visit and we had a look around the garden just to make sure everything was ok after the storm, fingers crossed the plant life will spring back into action in the spring time, although I have to say I'm a touch confused as to when that will be, 22+ degree heat tends to lead me to the conclusion that the storm we had for a week was the winter and we are now actually in the middle of spring.

After Florette left I biked up the other end of the beach and met in with Katharina for coffee, we met in Gazebo and sat in the sun all afternoon watching the surfers, well we did until our bellies got the better of us and we decided to head up to the main square for a late lunch.  I had a lovely afternoon chatting with Katharina about the people I have coming to visit this year, and the booklet I am looking at putting together for them with visitor information. Katharina gave me ideas for Jerusalem, we spoke about buses and trains, and different places to see in Israel. We ate in the late afternoon sun until we needed to say our goodbyes with the promise of catching up again real soon, I headed home on my bike and waited for My Beloved to arrive and then we headed to the gym.

Monday. Oh dear god My Beloved has received a call from the bank, they have noticed some unexpected activity on his account. Apparently 8 transactions from Walmart appeared within one hour and the bank decided this was unusual, jeeeez can a girl not order knickers............

Tuesday I have no idea what is going on with my sleep pattern just now, but what I do know is this, those bloody moths ate through the newspaper I tied to the lampshade and when I switched on the light the paper fell down, and the moths had managed to cut their way through the newspaper and what fell from the shade was a beautiful paper chain of butterflies, obviously I need to stop taking the pills. I eventually got out of bed and plodded into the shower, just in case I fell back to sleep and had another stupid dream, after my shower my computer and I headed to Landwers for breakfast, I cycled down the beach road and managed to stop my computer flying out of my basket only because I didn't do my usual and hit all the ramps at speed, I'm sure they haven't put speed ramps in for bikes, but its my teeth that are cracking with all the bumps not the car drivers and their over inflated tyres.

I sat with my computer at Landwers after my yogurt and fruit and museli breakfast oh and two cups of caffeine and started to sort through the information I am putting together for all the guests that will be visiting us this year, I was fair chuffed with myself when I eventually shut the lid as I was pretty much finished and if I say so myself it was pretty damned good.

SHAME I DIDN"T FECKING SAVE IT, when I got home I opened the computer to find that the work I had been doing all morning was no where to be seen, I couldn't even find it in the trash, to say I was raging would have been an understatement, I could do no more than to start again.

Today is election day and My Beloved should have been off work for the day, unfortunately he had a lot of work to get sorted so was in until around 2pm, we then decided to take a trip to Tel Aviv to see the street artists in Hatachana, BAD MOVE when we eventually got through the traffic we were then stuck in another jam trying to find a parking space, we did no more than head out towards the New Tel Aviv port, we still couldn't get anywhere close so we headed home, very, very slowly as even the homeward bound traffic was horrendous, note to self when its a public holiday take the bus if they are running!!

This evening I was speaking with the Demonic one about her trip over in the summer, we are going to get her and my granddaughter over in July sometime and she thought it would be a good idea to inform me that she is still called by her maiden name of Williams as she has not sorted out a new passport since getting married in 2007, but what is worse is she informed me that her driving license is also in her maiden name of Williams, that's not the worst of it, she doesn't know how it happened, she is not even sure if it is her fault or the DVLA but her driving license now states she is known as Mrs L Vagina L Williams, give me strength, she also informed me she has purchased land which now makes her 

Lady L.Vagina L. Williams I am speechless, she of course on the other hand finds this hysterical especially when pulled over by the police and they get her name wrong and she informs them it is in fact Vagina as stated on her driving license.

Ra'anana and the bikes

My Beloved really doesn't have a lot of luck when it comes to transport, today when moving his bike the pedal fell off again, this mean't a lot of huffing and puffing and grumping and groaning whilst he tried to lift the saddle on my mountain bike, it would have been easier obviously if the thread on the bolt wasn't buggered but nothing appears to be easy when it comes to bikes and beloved's. Eventually we were on our way with My Beloved's seat at the correct height for his very long legs! We headed towards Ra'anana and brunch as we had decided to forego breakfast in favour of eating out in the sunshine.  We eventually got where we wanted to be only to find out that the town was shut, well it was for anything we needed the only folk out were carers with clients or bikers like ourselves, we turned around and headed back the way towards a little cafe we had spotted along our travels, as is usual when we arrived in front of the cafe something else caught my eye, and just as My Beloved was touching down I was off again and over the flyover.  We arrived in the biggest park I have ever seen and this was where everyone from Ra'anana was hiding, families were picnicking, and playing, riding the train and sailing, the place was absolutely mobbed.  There were long tables laid out with various foods, there was balloons tied to trees and children cycling and skating, babies in buggies and toddlers on trikes, the sun was shining and everyone was having a great time, even the Pelican in the water was having a good time, I didn't actually realise how fast those things can move in water, but trying to catch up with him to take a picture was actually dangerous as I was speed walking with my camera to my eye completely disregarding all around me, I decided it would be safer to get a distance shot especially as it was becoming more difficult to get through the thong of people coming in the other direction.

We ate brunch at cafe central and decided on the Israeli breakfast for two which as usual could have fed four, and we ate sitting in the sun surrounded by likeminded people out for Shabbat.  We eventually ploughed our way through our meals and then headed home again, not before My Beloved asked me to slow down, apparently he was having to work twice as hard as I was on my new lady bike because I have bigger wheels, this did actually turn out to be true when we got home and read the HR monitors and he had burnt 900 calories and I had only managed 379 so not happy about that. But I was grateful for small mercies my calories burnt turned out to be about 3/4 fat and as My Beloved's HR doesn't have that setting obviously his wasn't fat!!!

Landlords, Svenja and yogurt

Thursday gym first thing, then it was sorting the house out for my Landladies visit, Svenja was coming over for coffee mid morning and was also bringing the milk as we never buy milk, so when Svenja arrived we nattered away mainly because we haven't seen each other since before Christmas, I was making the Cappuccino's and it was then that we burst out laughing, once again the yogurt had been purchased instead of milk, I think the expats must be keeping the yogurt economy going strong because since my last accident with the pregnant one and her coffee, I have found out that many of our friends have also made the same mistake in Israel with the milk, its comforting to know your not alone in your stupidity, and I mean that in the nicest way.

Whilst Svenja and I were chatting the landlady called she was having car trouble and could she postpone, not a problem I told her, so we have rearranged for Sunday.  So Svenja and I took ourselves out into the garden and sat in the sunshine chatting, it was lovely and warm sitting down the side of the house and we chatted until it was time for her to leave taking with her the bike she had loaned us for when the Prince's were over.  I swept the side of the house and hoovered before heading down to the gym to meet the PT and his TRX, I got a shot whilst his client was being forced to run on the treadmill, and I have now ordered one for my personal use, whoopie doo, whoopie doo, I will soon be able to tie My Beloved to the nearest tree and not let him down until he has done everything I want him too, or at least promised to .

Our evening was spent at the Marina with the boss we met in the Irish bar and then headed to Yam 9 for supper, I ordered a dish and promptly forgot what I ordered and when my food arrived it had become Beef Szechaun and was accompanied by rice, I obviously had a moment of complete breakdown when I ordered that dish I don't like rice as a rule, but way to go Gregg he swapped his pad thai for my beef and all was good in the world again, we had a nice evening with everyone before we headed home.

Friday was spent in Tel Aviv, we decided to head in and find some of the areas we had been told about by Natalie, we headed in using Waze to guide us to the area we wanted to be in, we found a space and parked up, we then walked up and down Neve Tzedek looking for Hatachana, we eventually stopped for coffee and asked the waitress, and she pointed us back down the street, so after our coffee we left and headed down the street, and then back up and then around before I went into a store and again asked for Hatachana, again we were pointed down the street, it turns out we had not gone far enough and we discovered we have actually walked passed this area previously and never seen the station, today we were lucky enough to find it, and it was lovely strolling around the complex which has the Israeli Defence Museum next to it, the station is a complex of cafes and shops and restaurants, each store is quite lovely and exceptionally expensive, but its good to browse especially when you see things you haven't seen before. There was a train carriage which when you entered it gave you a 3D visual display showing how it used to be when it was in operation as well as a simulation of the train in motion, all this right next to the beach and we had never seen it. Neve Tzedek was very bohemian and the cafes all had outside seating, there were various jewellery stores, and shoe stores, clothes and organic juice bars, it was a lovely place to spend a day strolling around, or more especially spend an evening sitting outside drinking in the narrow streets that make up the area.

We eventually headed back home, My Beloved had a little work to do on the computer so I had a wee snooze before we hit the gym, the routine I did today left me with a face like a burst tomato, wow I was wiped out by the time I was finished, and stringing two words together became very difficult, we strolled along the promenade in the evening and stop for a bite to eat at the beach cafe over looking the sea, I really wasn't great company by this time as my body was starting to shut down so we had to leave before My Beloved would be forced to carry me home, although I have to say it would have kept him warm because bugger it was cold on the way home, I think it was because the breeze was coming off the sea, when we got in we took a coffee and then headed to bed, the last thing I remember saying to My Beloved was 'what time is it?' 11.30 was the reply I was horrified because I was convinced it was only around 8.30 and I was in bed early hahahaha obviously not then.

look at this clever set of dished, the picture below is how it stacks
together

Wiggle, Wiggle, Wiggle, Wiggle

Oh dear god, do not stay off the grog only to throw yourself in the VAT, neither of us have been eating a great deal and abstaining from the wine through the week mainly has been mediocre to say the least, the exercise has been hard and last night we had a little treat, to say we suffered through the night would be an understatement, we always thought it was the food that caused the acid, BUT last night we found out it is actually the fluid you throw on top of the food that kills you, oh my god, I got up for water thinking this would help and nope it just made it worse, we are both now giving up food completely in the hope that this torture will not re-occur.......

So this morning you can imagine the thought of the gym had the acid rising higher than my ankle socks, and My Beloved decided it was best he didn't go in case he threw up over the treadmill, he is such a light weight, me I got my routine ready and hit the gym like a thing possessed, only because I thought if I did it quick the acid may stay down, luckily my cunning plan worked. But boy was the workout hard this morning, not because of the wine you understand, but because it was particularly intense and tonight as I type this blog my backside is buggered and my pecs are puckered, tomorrow I may not even be able to use my arms again so in preparation I am leaving all my clothes on tonight so I'm ready when the landlord comes for a visit tomorrow lunch time, I might not smell good, but I will be dressed.

I have today decided my bum is too big for my waist, this is why I am having clothing issues, I think it best I don't go into details to much in case there is anyone reading of a weak disposition, but having said that I have today lost one inch off my hips and one off my waist, I just wish I could find some bloody clothes that would sit on my waist and not spin around it making me dizzy.

Being Lazy

So the last few days have been all about the exercise, my 30 day challenge is progressing nicely, just getting out of bed every morning let alone 30 days is challenging, but to up the intenstity of the workouts offft it's already tiring, yesterday it was all about the timing, how long it would take me to complete three rounds of five different exercises, 17 mins and 28 secs later and I was done, oh dear god I could hardly walk to the bike when I was finished, but I did get applauded by the PT that was in there with one of his clients, go me, he has even offered to show me his TRX on Thursday afternoon, I hoping this is not some kinky kind of PT sex toy.

I finished on the bike for the next 30 mins and then walked on the treadmill whilst My Beloved finished his workout, I have taken to walking barefoot on the treadmill, I'm trying to get my body used to nothing on my feet, still don't like, still sound like an elephant in jack boots, still don't think I'm ready for those vibrams yet.

Our evening was spent moaning to each other about our aches and pains in front of the TV, it wasn't like either of us had much energy for anything else, so we watched The Incredible Hulk mash up a few baddies before bed, I wonder if that was why I had bad dreams, maybe it's not a good idea to watch big green men before bed.

Burp Burp Burp

As anyone who has watched Rum Diary will know you never get back the time you wasted watching it, we gave up half way through as we just couldn't get to grips with it.

I woke after a very restless night and watched the new instalment of my 30 day challenge offt  it was gonna be burpees all the way, just love em, love, love em, NOT. So ipad, iphone, towel and headphones in hand off I went to the gym, shabbat means empty gym so thankfully no one got to see me burping like a hippo on heat, I am happy to report I survived right through to the end of the routine, and although I really did have to coach myself to keep at it, once I was finished I didn't feel as bad as I thought I would, well not really....

We decided to head to Tel Aviv today for a walk along the beach front, we took the car so we could park it on the north side of Dov airport and then walk into Tel Aviv new port, we would have walked from Herzliya but with the weather dumping 300% of expected rainfall for the time of year meant there would be no way that track road would not have been flooded so we parked it in the car park and walked along the shore line to Tel Aviv, the beach and paths were strewn with rubbish that has obviously been thrown around by old Ma Nature, everywhere was such a mess and it is going to take some time to get things back in order down there, the work has begun already as piles of drift wood and rubbish are piled at the far end of the beach, the river that leads into the sea was awash with bamboo of all things again it must have washed down the river over the last week and washed up on the banks at the mouth of the river. The sun was out as we walked along and warmed us up nicely, until we decided to stop for a coffee and a spot of lunch at the port, the wind coming into the coffee shop unfortunately made the store very chilly, and I decided we would have been better eating whilst walking just to keep ourselves warm.

One should not drink Zero through a straw because it leads to gas, all the way back to the car I was burping away the air that had obviously filtered its way down my straw, note to self use a glass....

Tonight for supper we had turkey, I'm getting my fair share of the Christmas bird now, hooray!! and it tasted so much better for being so much cheaper than the last little bird I purchased the other day .... during supper my DOMS decided to rear its ugly head and my fork became very heavy very quickly, I said it before and I will say it again, I love burpees me, love, love, love em :(

How much???????

Wet, cold, wet, dry, snow and hail..........

Thankfully it is now sunny and life can resume, being stuck in a house due to high winds and flying objects gets a tad boring, I did take my life in my hands yesterday as I had to get my Hep A booster and germs wait for no man, so off I went to Herzliya medical practice and my nice Swedish doctor who stuck me with his javelin before sending me on my way, I didn't even get a sweetie, what kind of a facility are they running over there. The afternoon bought with it sunshine which was very welcome and this pushed the temps back up to around 10 degrees with a real feel of 12, considering it was 8 degrees this morning with a real feel of 1 I was very grateful.  I don't get it though if the temperature is 10 who decides its really actually feeling 12, is there some poor soul outside the meteorological office peeling off layers of clothes shouting 'Oi Arron feels a bit toasty today like'...... 

The gym has been my sanctuary this week, but even that has been infiltrated by people who insist on using the equipment I want, hopefully these numbers will dwindle as Rafael informed me the building is quiet again as the holidays are over, not before time let me tell you.

Because the sun was shining I decided to jump on a bus and over to Herzliya Bet for some shopping, the butcher the grocer and the wine store, not a candle stick maker in sight, in the wine store a very nice looking young man told me I smelt lovely, how ironic I had remembered my deodorant but no perfume had been used, obviously I have my very own odour and he liked it, either that or he really was trying to push his afternoon sales up.  Next stop the butcher, a kilo of mince and a 2lb bird, oh and a bag of organic lentils, its not that I'm fussy you understand but I couldn't find ordinary lentils. I paid for my purchases and headed to the grocer before getting the bus back home.

When I got home I set about throwing my little bird in the oven, prepared the vegetables and then headed back to the gym again, the other half joined me twenty minutes later for his second session on the his walker, luckily for both of us we were alone, I gasped and groaned my way through my routine and jumped over my skipping rope like a REAL pro!!! PROBATIONER, it's no wonder I have knees that looks like balloons.......

Whilst we were eating our supper a thought popped into my head and I asked 'How much is 154 shekels in proper money?' I have since been informed that I have bought a chicken some mince and a small bag of organic lentils for £25.50, once My Beloved released his grip on my throat and controlled himself he asked if I would shop in another store, and more especially one with cheap meat and chicken...... enough said.

Should have stayed at home

Wow if I thought the weather was bad yesterday it was nothing compared to today, I was scared out of my bed with the thunder that shock me to the core, I don't think I have ever heard such a loud clap of thunder in my life, I can almost smell the fear that shot through me as I lay in my bed, and I don't scare easily where weather is concerned, but man that was some mother clacker clangers going on out there.

I took it into my head that Tel Aviv was where I should be today, I needed to return an item Abbie had bought and today seemed like as good a day as any, I really should have checked the news before leaving, the roads were atrocious and as I entered the motorway on my lovely grey and orange bus I checked out the Jerusalem post, and needless to say I should have stayed home, trains were disrupted, motorways chocker block and water levels in the Sea of Galilee at an all time high, when I eventually got off the bus I had to time my walk to the Azrieli centre exactly to match the puddles and the busses, mainly because getting soaked by one of those puddles would have been a little like being swept away by the parting of the seas. 

I managed to get to the centre with my feet dry and looking remarkably presentable considering the gale outside, but why is it as soon as you get inside all the clothing you layered on to keep you warm starts to attack your body in such a way that if you don't strip down in double quick time you will be suffocated by a scarf pretending to be a boa or compressed by a waterproof jacket masquerading as a python tightening my chest, and why is it all this bloody layering is heavy when you have to carry it around on your arm all day.

Today I collected my prescription for my Hepatitis A booster shot, this was quite a feat considering the gentleman who served me at the chemist where I had ordered it didn't have any English, and even though it was written on my script he still asked me what it was I was needing, then I had to show my passport before being given a huge icicle to keep my vaccine cold until I could get it home and in the fridge, this really was unnecessary today as the weather would have kept it cool without the need for ice, anyway me and my icicle headed home and out of the horrid weather.

I though my feet were bleeding

Wow I woke this morning after very little sleep, one because My Beloved snored like a trouper and two because Mother Nature obviously had the raging hump with Herzliya last night, the wind battered around the town and rampaged down the streets, she left chaos in her wake, and when I lifted the blinds this morning the first thing I had to do was put the garden furniture back where it should be, bring the cushions inside and dry them out, the hidihole I had for them under the BBQ had been completely dry until obviously a gust of wind had lifted and turned the cover insides out and off the BBQ completely, garden chairs were upended and the tarpaulin over the bikes was heavier than usual due to the amount of rain water sitting on top of it, three attempts it took me to lift it.  The side of the house looked like someone with a truck load of soil had decided to throw it our way, and the leaves which up until now I had thought were remarkably staying on the trees considering it is January have been ripped from their trees and strewn all around the house.

The sea today was as wild as a bag of wild things, and not one surfer was to be seen which is unusual, but I can't say I blame them, it was crackers out there.  Traffic lights were once again facing in the wrong directions and iron gates had been ripped off their fences, just a normal day in paradise really.

I had only been walking a little while when once again my feet began to hurt, I have decided that my feet do not like boots or shoes that have no depth to their sole, but let me tell you the 15 shekel insoles I bought today were worth their weight in gold, I almost glided home once I put them in, and obviously that was before I had left the shop.

Two gyms sessions done today but because I had slept so badly I yawned all the way through the first session and fought myself all the way through the second, surely this exercise malarky should be getting easier by now.

Take friendship where you can find it.....

Up with the larks this morning, ironing done, then it was time to hit the gym, I really am going to have to say something to someone about these people that keep using my gym, today there was some old fella in there, all white haired and tennis attired, when I was busy breathing out of my backside mainly due to that damned new Zuzuna workout, a thought struck me, what if old white haired fella needs first aid, or worse still resuscitation, he picked the wrong gym buddy today, I can only count to 5 in Hebrew and even then with my Dyscalculia I'm not sure I would get to 5 without missing eh'ad, shtey or shalosh and that's if I even have the correct gender for the numbers, I prayed he managed to stay healthy whilst I bounced around the gym, luckily for him and me he left the gym before I was finished, and I didn't find him on the stairs when I left, we can only be thankful for small mercies. 

One should not be too picky about where one finds a friend, well as long as they are not white haired and needing resus obviously, anyway being in a foreign country and being on your own doesn't give you the luxury of choice, my new friend whom I met in Tel Aviv is quite different from the usual friends I make, he is a male, obviously, (the he would give that away) but thats not unusual as I have quite a few male friends, he does have a bit of an aggressive nature, but again something I'm used to, he wasn't exactly talkative about himself, but I did determine he is a bit a heat seeker, much like myself really and it was bloody cold outside today in Tel Aviv, he also has the strangest name which I will try and remember before the end of my blog.

Tel Aviv was blustery and thankfully dry, I have no idea how far I walked today, all I do know is that my feet were in pieces when I got on the bus home, and when I arrived home it was actually torture walking the short distance from the bus to the house, I reminded myself of one of those lovely children stomping after a parent flopping their feet down in disgust because they have been dragged away for some extremely important facebook status, flop, flop, flop went my feet, if it wasn't worse torture to buy new boots, I would get out to those shops, but as some of you know my feet are not made for shoes, but unfortunately for me I can't stand being barefoot..........

My new friend Pre Dator

Roast Chicken

Its been a while since I have dealt with anything larger than breast, but today I decided I was gonna roast the whole bird, so My Beloved and I headed for the Seven Stars malls, firstly I gave My Beloved a tour of all the fancy stalls with their hot foods to take away, the cakes stalls and the chocolatier.

We had a spot of lunch which once again turned out to be a mountain of food in a bucket sized bowl, we shared and chatted whilst the world walked by, the mall was very busy as we were very close to closing which is why when we went into the supermarket we saw the queues at the tills and turned tail and ran in the direction of Arena mall and the supermarket there.

A much more sedate affair, we picked up the roast chicken for our evening meal, a few bits and pieces and then headed back home, I decided to prepare my bird before heading for the gym, I unwrapped him from his double layer of plastic supermarket carrier bags and flung that birdie around by its leg like a new born baby being held up by the midwife, luckily for me this birdie wasn't squealing, especially when I ripped out his giblets, and tore off his wings and threw them in the pan for my gravy. Oven set, bird in and gym time it was, being as it was my second visit of the day I was to say the least a little tired so I left My Beloved to it and headed up to check on my bird.  The smell that wafted up my nostrils as I entered the apartment was delectable, I have to say I have forgotten how much I love a whole roast chicken, I think I may even stop buying just the breast meat from now on.

Our evening was spent educating our South African friend Jason into the way of Apple and his new Mac Book Pro, I think I have sorted him out, but watch this space.

I am now the head electrician in the house, since moving in we have had a little irritation with our electric blinds, they are electric which is great, but they are not automatic, and having a low boredom threshold you can imagine my annoyance that I have to stand with my finger on the switch until the blinds are in the direction I want them, so I have now fixed my switches, who would of thought a toothpick could be such a useful little tool!!

Hospital visits and Hotels

Gym session done and finished and it was time to sort out the domestics before I was winging my way to Tel Aviv, and visiting the new baby on the block, eventually I found a parking space, but not before going in one car park and coming out again, you would think they would have a system where by the little machine knows its actually full, and truly you will not squeeze one more car on the end of that row!!!

Anyway I found myself a car park quite a distance from the hospital, had I read the instructions from google I would have been closer, but with the traffic at a standstill most of the time so I decided to cut my loses and throw it in the first available space, so I walked to the Ichlov Hospital and then the fun began.

Security search and metal detectors upon entry,  and trying to find two people on a site that houses what appeared to be most of Tel Aviv's medical hierarchy and their patients proved rather difficult.  Eventually I found a very nice Russian receptionist, well of course I did this is Israel after all!!! And once I called Julie and asked her where exactly she was my new Russian friend directed me to the Baby Hotel, yes they have a Baby Hotel connected to the Maternity hospital, with an interconnecting walkway, which allows the mothers direct access to the plushest Baby Hotel I have seen, the whole third floor is taken up with babies and new mothers. The rest of the floors are taken up with Doctors and specialists of every description.

Julie and baby Oydis opened the door to me, and yes Julie fibbed to me Oydis was not 10lb8oz she was the cutest little thing, all black haired and adorable. Julie thought it was funny to kid me on about the weight as they had kept telling her that Oydis would be a corker when she was expecting.  We chatted and laughed about the whole birthing experience and then Oydis was settled back into nursery so Mummy could get a coffee.  The Baby Hotel sits atop a shopping mall, I was amazed and the noise and people was quite extraordinary.  Julie informed me that the Baby Hotel was really quiet unlike the maternity hospital which apparently is like party land 24/7, especially New Years eve apparently when they had David Ghetta blasting out in the foyer, just what you need when your exhausted after a particularly long labour.

My Beloved and I decided to spend our evening at the cinema, and after checking the times, we decided to leave the short hairy people with big feet until another day, so it was off to see Impossible for us, and funnily enough Abbie was in seeing it in Aberdeen, it was a heart wrenching story of courage and family, and although I never broke the flood gates I did wipe a tear from my eye once or twice.

New Years Eve Baby

Our New Years eve was spent in the company of Jason, we booked a table at the Meat bar for 8pm, and when we arrived the waitress showed us to our table, an outside table I might add, but it wasn't so bad as we were sitting under the heaters.  My Fillet steak was mouthwatering as usual and hardly touch the sides before it was wrapping itself around my heart like a hairy worm. They don't really celebrate New Year in the same way we do, and don't forget we had already had Rosh HaShana which is the Jewish New year sometime in September, but it was good to see the waitresses dressed up with Happy New year tiarras, and tinsel had been wrapped around the tree. 

We left the restaurant and headed for Mike's place, luckily for us we had arrived early enough to get a space as the place was filling up quickly with like minded people who maybe did or didn't celebrate the New Year. Who would know, it was busy and noisy and just like New Year in the UK except no Doric and definitley no random trying to get his tongue down your throat, yuk I really don't miss that, having once been caught out many moons ago in Cornhill, I quickly learn't my lesson, I was violated I tell you, VIOLATED..

Whilst we were out we received texts messages from Julie and Snorre, baby Oydis had joined the world at 15.10 weighing in at 10lb 8oz Happy New Year, beautiful new baby.

I think we arrived home sometime after 2am, who would know I do know it was still dark, and I do know I wasn't exactly sober, but I wasn't drunk either.

New Years Day

We had a lazy day, no gym today and we only exercised out of necessity, but I don't really think I slow walk to collect the car should be classed as exercise, today we had our first Turkey dinner of the season, and it was lush, but no pigs in blankets as they had been eaten Christmas day, and no cranberry sauce, offft, I will have to try and be better prepared next year. Empty suitcases next time we leave the country and I will be filling them with bacon, cranberry, cheese and onion crisps and Glenfiddich. We have recently found Dairy milk in the store around the corner, first time ever since we have been here, but sods law is that we are now on diets, so it may be in the shops, but that is where it is gonna stay for the considerable future.

We are both now chasing the wagon, apparently Lou Lou is driving said wagon after a bad experience with cocktails New Years eve, but My Beloved and I are up the back kicking and screaming, I may have to be tied to that wagon.........